"Biting my lip 2 tranfer this pain, ur gone and I'm still going thru withdrawl"

Sun, 11 Jun 2006 18:26:45 GMT

http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y45/allisterrawk24/Fuckin%20Right%20Doggy/

"Restart the cycle and revive the memory..."

Sun, 11 Jun 2006 18:12:37 GMT

so i basically i have nothing in the world to say EXCEPT im crazy in love with a boy.
my life is so fucking good right now. meh nothing to say...pictures...

http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y45/allisterrawk24/Fuckin%20Right%20Doggy/

"Finding my way back to, all the promises that we made..."

Wed, 12 Apr 2006 00:37:03 GMT

So. I was bored and realized its been a long time since I played with this thing. BUT i think i will update more often. even tho no one even reads this ne more. Except prolly sarah yonts (whom i love dearly lol)

ok so hmmm my life lately.
Im doing so bad in school i dont even know wat to do ne more. im failing a lot and prolly have to take summer school. actually i know i do.

socially the only stuff i really do is go to bolingbrook or stay in chicago and hang out with markie and my boyfriend (yes katie has a bf finally hehe), I smoke entirely too much pot for my small little body but i dont give no fuck.

so i really dont feel like talking or bitching bout all the bad things going on in my life so ill talk bout nick.

Ok so im pretty gay for him already. Im trying not to rush things but feelings move so fast sometimes and there is no stopping mine at this point. hes such a great guy. i just really love being around him and he makes me feel so much better. when im with him i feel like im worth something and that he cares as much as i do. i can just like lay around with this kid and not have a care in the world and that is the best feeling ever. :)

Ummmm im on spring break right now so no school for me, but im gonna start actually attending school and trying a lot harder cuz i need to stop fucking up. i know i can do better.

well im off. byebye.

go download if u have ne wanting to listen to good music these 3 songs

Self Against City- The Process
Marvelous 3- Cigarette Lighter Love song
From First to Last- Note to self

"note to self:i miss u terribly..."

Mon, 20 Feb 2006 02:25:00 GMT

yawn...well i forgot i had one of these bad boys lol. so yes life right now...hmmm still sucks! haha wat a fuckin shock.
boys hahahaa im an idiot and am prolly fuckin up a possible amazing relationship cuz im completely infactuated with this boy that ive been "with" for awhile....we never dated or nething but i wanna be with him so bad, he makes me love fighting lol. we fight sooooo much, its like if we ever dated (which we wont) i dont think we would have ne thing to fight about lol.
other than that, ive been in oaklawn hanging out with my buddies a lot. i have a lot of good times but i feel guilty cuz i feel my best friend slipping away and it sucks cuz no matter what i do to fix things it doesnt seem like ne thing will get better.
i <3 her more than ne thing and i think she knows it. just dont know if she cares...

jeffrey binks bday is soon. i <3 her.

lots and lots of new pics for u guys to play with

www.photobucket.com-allisterrawk24

NEW ALLISTER PICS UP THERE TOO.

allister march 8th at the house of blues with mest. for my bday bitches :)
cuz im lucky and my fave band plays on my bday :)

"its all in ur head..."

Sat, 07 Jan 2006 00:25:17 GMT

ugh..................................i hate this feeling.....and the feelings that will follow

allister is playing on my birthday, thats amazing...

my mood sucks. sorry

ive been having lots of fun but that fun will pay off...i know it.

"when soul meets body.........."

Sat, 31 Dec 2005 06:40:36 GMT

OMFG i havent updated in ages, i apoligize. ummmmmmm well lately, i HAVE been missing amanda, have been hanging with markie a lot, working a lot, being upset a lot, hanging with new ppl a lot. feeling like poo a lot.

well to start off tonight i guess i will tell u about. its 12:39 and im not tired yet, im not drunk ne more, i seen tucker tonite, hes a great guy, cocky arrogant and thank god i only see the boy once every few months cuz he is a riot.
now im at georges with markie and this boy mike(my chick)

AMANDA I MISS YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3

2mm is new years, im gonna get so fuckin wasted, im excited, no new years resolution, i wont keep it. :(

next week i work mon-thurs and thurs nite im sleepin at crystals with amanda...

then my break is over after that weekend. LAME=SCHOOL

lol i dont like the postal service, they are kinda boring...well rite now, maybe id like them in a different mood, i wanna listen to allister...*sigh*

"chapter 3, the lies lawyers never tell.."

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 22:30:52 GMT

so im at amandas cuz my computer is still broken :(

i really really really really really really miss dan a lot.

ive been hanging out with old friends lately, jessica, kayla, sarah, just to catch up with lost times.
i need a new job...ne suggestions?

my xmas presents are gonna suck cuz i have no money.

my winter is starting off to no good...

wel im going back to eating my chips.

<3

"i should be ashamed of this, im not!"

Sat, 26 Nov 2005 02:01:34 GMT

well
im torn with a lot of things and cant even put into words how i feel
i just know i love my friends and dont wanna loose them
i spend all my time with my friends and i dont care bout skool or feeling better or ne thing. its scary. i love the audition they are a good band.

i got new pics but i dont have a scanner.

amanda makes my heart giggle
kevin marosey poo makes a pretty grl. lol

*sigh*

thank u sarah for letting me on ur puter since mine is broken

silence

Fri, 18 Nov 2005 05:46:25 GMT

im so tired
i need a new job cuz mine i work a day a week and its bullshit all of a sudden and i dont wanna be broke and i need to get my friends good xmas gifts.

im gettin really smashed this weekend so no one expect to hear from me, i will not be accessible, i will be relaxing haha

i seen markie :)
i went out to bolingbrook, i missed her so much

i <3 amanda lesbian bear

"when i look in ur eyes, i see much more than u, i cant beileve how fuckin strange u really are..."

"baby dont move at al, cuz ur about to break my fall, stay where u are, staring at the stars..."

Wed, 16 Nov 2005 20:39:08 GMT

i love butch walker so much, he played the most amazing show monday night. like i cant even put in words how great it was :)

its been one year since me and kamil broke up...woopty doo lol

work sucks, they cut my hours, fuckers

i met a boy named pat, he is fun

i hang with amanda a lot, shes nuts, i <3 her

i miss markie

blah thats it

"fall asleep to me, ill be there when u wake up..."

Sun, 13 Nov 2005 03:28:29 GMT

senses fail owned the metro and house of blues. the early november was swell too. i met a boy named Pat yesterday, he is fun. I got all crunk with him yesterday and stayed over near Depaul and went home and got yelled at cuz i didnt tell the parentals where i was, but ya 4 hrs of sleep, took the train home, showered, went to work, that was LAME- i hate working, my new store sucks ass. FUCK XMAS. im way exhausted. night <3

Mon, 07 Nov 2005 18:21:36 GMT

senses fail senses fail senses fail senses fail senses fail senses fail

the early november:)

saves the day :)

on to night 2 of them...

woooooooooooooooooo

"go to hell, who needs u? i say that cuz i dont beileve u"

Sun, 30 Oct 2005 01:47:03 GMT

Punchline is awesome, GO listen to them...on purevolume...NOW!!!!

So my weekend so far, yesterday went to school super late at like 930, then went out with markie, paula, and jill....good times yo. we were all over the place acting a fool lol. then me and markie smoked mad style with amber and ken then me her and erin met up and went by this guy joe and smoked sum more woot!!! i was super duper fucked up and slept well, blew off detention dismorning, erin and markie left, i showered went to watch my friend tuckers band practice, his band was pretty swell, its a shame i couldnt watch their show 2nite but i may go get crunk with all them 2nite... i hope so...hehe

i <3 parked cars in playground parking lots in daylight.

'you make me hard when i'm all soft inside
I see the truth when i'm all stupid-eyed
the arrow goes straight through my heart
without you everything just falls apart

my blood just wants to say hello to you
my fear is warm to get inside of you
my soul is so afraid to realize
how every little bit is left of me

take me with you
without you everything just falls apart
it's not as much fun to pick up the pieces'

"look at what we've all turned out to become..."

Tue, 25 Oct 2005 02:14:06 GMT

sry for the lack of updates, ive been miserably busy, got to see markie this weekend that was decent. getting fucked up this weekend, plannin on making an ass of myself. im so fuckin sick of guys, i really really am, ive been trying to be patient in this dating game but it just seems not worth it ne more.i miss so many ppl...argh. fuck i hate the cold, it brings out the fucked up side of me, i just cant let myself get as fuckin bad as i was last year...the question is now am i gonna let myself get better than last year...or worse....

"i can honestly say...that i never ever ever felt this way..."

Thu, 13 Oct 2005 03:26:43 GMT

i need new books to read.

im missing a lot of school cuz my grandpa is sick and i have to take care of him.

i dread my progress report...it should be here tomarrow.

the new allister cd is so fuckin great i strongly suggest u go get it its called Before the Blackout. So far number 8 and 9 are my faves...much love for the allister baby! woot woot.

new pictures on the photobucket.... username - allisterrawk24

if ur gonna take any just let me know.

ummm i get my check this weekend so i wanna get drunk and stupid :)

blah im such a bad kid...watever. i dont care.

i found a very old stupid picture of HIM...it made me laugh but then made me realize that he was really fat when i was with him and i must have really loved him cuz i never noticed it trully until today. i talk to this girl liz about these things, she is funny as hell and agrees with me a majority of the time.

katie hates chemistry, geometry, and honors british literature, im not failing cuz i copy. :(

i feel very dumb,

sleep time.

"single is the way for me, come play with me ahhh"

Mon, 10 Oct 2005 22:24:28 GMT

the last few days....

work. blue puckers. cigarettes. blood brothers. no no dance :)
movies, food, friends, drama, sleep :)

school 2mm :(

the next few days, work, school, friends (maybe)

that time of the month sucks...blah.

im going to listen to my new alister cd. AGAIN. for the 20450436945894 time today

"Can u make me a promise? stop it before it begin,can u hold on to my head if i ever loose it again"

Tue, 04 Oct 2005 19:05:38 GMT

got my tattoo fixed, been working a lot, skool is a homo. ummm got out early 2day. went to mcdonalds with amanda, good times. ummm im hungry so im gonna go eat so more crap. <3

Go download Marvelous 3 music. Thats Butch Walkers old band and they are A-M-A-Z-I-N-G.

ALLISTER ON THURSDAY :)

i listened to a lot of music today

Wed, 28 Sep 2005 01:05:54 GMT

So I was in a music mood all day and now I'm bored. So here was my playlist for the day.

Allister-D2
The Academy is-Checkmarks
Panic at the Disco-Its time to Dance
Bright Eyes-First Day of my life
Armor For Sleep-Car Underwater
All American Rejects-Your Star
The Used-The taste of ink
Alkaline Trio-Time to waste
August Premier-Fireworks and Alcohol-entire cd
Much The Same-Quitters Never Win-entire cd
Weezer-Say it aint so
Vertical Horizon-Everything you want
Deftones-Change
New Radicals-Someday We'll Know
Punchline-Getting there is getting by
Nine inch nails-Perfect Drug
Moneen-Passing of America
Cold-Stupid Girl
Sozzi-Letting Go
Sixpense None the Richer-Kiss me
The Early November-Ever so sweet
HIM-Together in death
The Click Five- Pop Princess
Gin Blossoms-Hey Jealousy
Smashing Pumpkins-Disarm
and now listening to Allister-Dead Ends and Girlfriends album

" baby join me in death..."

Tue, 27 Sep 2005 23:22:22 GMT

So me and Dan are now just "friends". Boys are fuckin dumb.

I got to see Aaron today. That cheered me up mucho!, I <3 that kid. He moved to Kentucky so it was nice to see him.

Butch walker on thursday :)

ALLISTER NEXT WEEK :)

homework. peace.

"so dont explain, cuz i kno exactly wat ur going to say..."

Sat, 24 Sep 2005 04:50:36 GMT

dan <3

dan again<3

http://photobucket.com/albums/y45/allisterrawk24/

the rest are on there, have fun.

im refusing to think, everytime a thought crawls into my head i get sad....

stupid tooth...hurts very bad. gawd. good night

Wed, 21 Sep 2005 20:39:15 GMT

im crazy bout dan end of story

pics will b up soon

Sun, 18 Sep 2005 17:29:01 GMT

i <3 dan!

he is AMAZING. he makes all the fucked up shit around me okay. my weekend was pretty great. worked and spent friday and saturday night till the am hours with him. today i have work then homework...later days.

"ive gotta couple of killing machines..."

Fri, 16 Sep 2005 03:34:39 GMT

workschoolworkschoolworkschoolworkschooldanworkdanworkschool

thats my life now basicly lol. ummmm this weekend will be spent with dan and working. me and him are together but we arent officially a couple but basically. he makes me happy :)

i <3 dan jarvis

good night my loves no time to type must call ppl and do homework

im so scared of getting my heart broken, but u make me wanna take that risk

Mon, 12 Sep 2005 02:28:04 GMT

so i havent wrote in here in forever and ever

skool is really gay, pointless classes, its ok cuz my friends but watever. nothing matter. finally i found a boy i wanna date...and he says no...then changes his mind...but ya in that time i met another boy i like wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy more and i have no clue if he wants a gf but i plan on discussing this with him wen he comes to see me on tuesday. ive been working my ass off, worked on thursday from 345-830, saturday from 1030-430,today from 1045-500, and 2mm from 4:30-900, it wont be so bad once we open the store and have everything set up but its a disaster now. coffee spilt on my pants today and then i got hit in the head with a peg (the poles u hang merchandise on) and ya i have a welt on my fore head :(

im exhausted and all i can think bout is one of those boys i like, he has the prettiest eyes ever, and he has curly cute hair, and he licked my nose and called me adorable...i swear if he doesnt want a gf ill be so sad.

very odd things are going on in my life...bahhhhhhhhh

"baby would u die 2nite for love?"

"the consequences of ur actions really are just a game..."

Sun, 04 Sep 2005 17:30:08 GMT

Hola ppl. So I dont write in here much but I will since skool starts on tuesday. Well this weekend has been nuts.

friday-drunk and high with my markieface :)

saturday-june,the audition and junior varsity at the metro,

today-i have no clue

my summer is almost over. skool and work will take up my time and thats fine with me. it will occupy my mind. then i can make money and get me my tattoos already man....allister is kinda soon. im so excited. this is my concert schedule fo sho.

september 29-butch walker at park west

october 6th-allister, much the same, and split habit at logan square

november 6th- senses fail, saves the day, the early november, say anything

november 7th-senses fail, saves the day, the early november, say anything

then sumtime in december allister is coming back and plus taste of chaos will be during that time too and i kno thats gonna be good cuz its the used, rise against,story of the year and a static lullaby.

yay for shows.

shower time